Tough Decisions

Each day I wonder what it is I will write about, what will occur during the course of my day that will make its way to this page, make its way to you. This morning I thought it would be the laughter that accompanied my ride to Skowhegan, laughter I shared with a friend, a new friend, a friend with a badly sprained ankle and a wedding to attend (it's her right ankle...no driving yet). Riding with her, my car filled with guffaws and smiles (particularly when she described the look she received from a friend after a comment she made..."she looked at me like I'd slept with her father"....now you understand the guffaws!).

As we drove and talked and discovered that it is highly likely our fathers knew each other professionally (they both died young) I again assumed that would be the blog post, that realization that long before we met, before we shared our writing together, before we introduced our husbands to each other, before we shared our grief, we were somehow united.

But as the day passed, as difficult decisions and tough conversations overshadowed my work, the laughter of the morning faded and the reality that the decisions I make, the choices I choose have an impact and that impact is powerful, even when the decisions and choices are the right ones. Right doesn't equal easy.

I'm glad the day is over. I'm glad the work of today is finished. I'm glad the day started with laughter. I'm glad the memory of my father surfaced....I needed him today.